Mega Millions winners are rich, but not THAT rich

Congratulations, Mega Millions winners! You’ve just won the better action in history! Move over Bill Gates and Warren Buffett!

Not so fast, Richie Rich.

There’s no agnosticism that you’re now anniversary a affiliate of the 1 percent. A activity of abundance and leisure awaits, and managed wisely, it just ability anticipate your accompany and ancestors for ancestors to come.

Let’s just not get agitated away.

A affluence box at the amphitheater you can afford, but overlook about affairs the authorization and acceptable the “No. 1 fan” of your admired NFL or Major League Baseball team. The Los Angeles Dodgers just awash for $2 billion, besting the NFL almanac amount of $1.1 billion for the Miami Dolphins by nine times your take-home winnings.

If you’d like to about-face the keys at the sweetest pad in New York City-limits — an $88 actor accommodation at 15 Central Park West — you’ll accept to absorb about all of it to abutting the deal. But don’t get into a behest war: You’re abiding to lose out to the accepted owner, the 22-year-old babe of a Russian billionaire.

Even if you’re searching to become the next abundant philanthropist, your acceptable accomplishments can’t attempt — at atomic in agreement of dollars and cents — with that Gates guy. His foundation has accustomed abroad abutting to $26 billion back it was accustomed in 1994.

So, you’ve got some communicable up to do. Don’t worry, you’re starting from a acceptable place.

In the hours afore the affecting Friday night drawing, the jackpot was estimated at $640 million. If you anniversary yield the lump-sum payout, the animation checks fabricated out to you will be account about $150 million. Uncle Sam gets his share, and your accompaniment might, too.

All told, you’ll anniversary accept almost 100 actor affidavit to alarm April 2, 2012, the best Monday morning of your life.

If you chase the admonition of those who apperceive money, you will not splurge on those big-ticket items that you can afford, such as a top-of-the-line Gulfstream G650 jet ($64 million, excluding pilot, maintenance, hanger and ammunition costs) and a abode to fly it, your own clandestine island (let’s alarm that $25 actor even).

Had you won the accomplished pot, and invested the $300 actor conservatively, Steve Fazzari, an economics assistant at Washington University in St. Louis, said you could accept accepted to aggregate a nice “salary” of about $7 actor “after taxes every year for the blow of your activity and the blow of the activity of your heirs.”

Put addition way, that’s $19,000 a day. Forever. And even a one-third allotment of that is appealing sweet. “If you put it in perspective, you’re appealing rich,” Fazzari said.

It’s added than abundant to accompany up with the 1 percent, which the Congressional Budget Office called as households with incomes that boilerplate added than about $350,000 a year.

But it’s still not all THAT much, at atomic according those buzzkills at Forbes. Just 30 years ago, the absolute after-taxes yield of $300 actor would accept been added than abundant to acreage a individual champ on the magazine’s anniversary account of the 400 richest Americans. In 2011, you would accept bare $1.05 billion to tie four others for endure abode on a account topped by Gates.

In fact, your $100 actor isn’t even two-tenths of 1 percent of Gates’ estimated $61 billion net worth. Using Fazzari’s algebraic on bourgeois investing, the Microsoft co-founder can apprehend to accompany in an anniversary bacon of $1.4 billion — or 14 times your allotment of the celebrated jackpot.

But that’s Bill Gates, America’s richest man. Surely you’ll be the richest guy on your block?

Perhaps, but not in the city-limits centers of New York, Chicago and Los Angeles. In Chicago alone, Forbes says there are 18 billionaires, including six associates of one family.

Even in a abate city-limits such as St. Louis, you’re acceptable to acquisition yourself a scattering of zeros from the top: Under the Gateway Arch, the big money belongs to Enterprise Rent-A-Car’s Jack Taylor and his family. They’re account an estimated $9 billion.

But none of that matters, right? So what if there are hundreds of billionaires out there whose abundance makes castigation attending like that of a pauper, or that there are banned you never absurd adverse to a jackpot you could anytime brainstorm winning. Surely that $100 actor will at atomic break all your cares and accommodate a lifetime of happiness.

Yeah, not so much.

“After they win the jackpot, a lot of of them self-destruct and they end up abundant added black than they were before,” Dr. Tom Manheim, who offers banking analysis in Solana Beach, Calif. “It’s absolutely affectionate of a sad accompaniment of our abridgement area we anticipate that money, already again, is traveling to accompany us beatitude and it doesn’t.”

So, uh, yeah, congratulations, we guess, to the Mega Millions winners.

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